Gay and Married Men's Association
GAMMA is a collection of gay men who are/were in a heterosexual marriage.
We are a group of friends who can provide each other with information and insight about coming out, gay culture, health, and relationships.
Members advocate no position relative to the continuation or cessation of marriage.
All views on relationships are honored.
Our goal is to provide empathic support to gay men who are married, who have been married, or who are planning to marry, and need to talk about their gayness in relation to straight wives, children, the workplace, friends and relatives.
Characteristics of GAMMA Members
We interpret our name loosely. Some of us identify ourselves as gay, bisexual, or even "mostly straight." Some of us are currently married while others are separated or divorced. Some are contemplating divorce, others are hoping for reconciliation. Most of us have come out to our (former) wives, some are doing so at this time, while others have not revealed their gayness to their wives. Most of us have children.
Highly diverse in education, background, and income, we represent the entire adult age spectrum. Some men continue in their marriages, while having gay friends and/or gay lovers. Others find GAMMA their only outlet for gay-oriented associations.
We all have different ways of managing our lives, and GAMMA members honor the differences. Some members are entirely secret about their sexuality; others are as open as possible. No particular way is right for everyone.
While we are supportive of members in great need, we are not equipped to do crisis intervention.
Why We Stay In Touch
We are glad to find that we are not alone. It is a relief to be with other men who are working out their own answers to some shared questions:
- Am I gay or bisexual?
- Can I be married and sexually active with others?
- Do I want to do this, given my wish to be loyal, my feelings of guilt, of frustration etc.?
- How can I meet men?
- Should I come out to my wife? How?
- How about my children?
- My friends and business associates?
- How can I deal with other people's feelings about me?
We try to talk more honestly, trusting that the person we really are will be truly heard and honored. We are a group of supportive guys, not therapists. Many friendships are formed through the network.
To Contact Us
Send an email and our coordinator will respond and will discuss your needs. Then he can follow up by giving you the email and/or phone number of a GAMMA member. It may be possible to assemble a few GAMMA members at one of our homes in order to meet with you and discuss your issues.